My sister made me pancakes from scratch for breakfast
stuffed with blueberries, raspberries, and nuts
Yesterday, I was texting my friend \”B\” back and forth. We text back and forth almost everyday and have been doing so since we worked together in the mortgage industry over ten years ago. At the end of our string of texts, \”B\” wrote back \”you have a lot of support\”.
I do. I do have a lot of support from so many.
The other day, I was reading that the average time off given from a job in the United States for the loss of a spouse or child is four days.
I won\’t repeat the long outburst of obscenities that came out of my mouth when I was telling my sister what I found out. 4 days off from work after the death of a child or spouse.
I said to my sister \”this is so cruel, how cruel can you be\”. I shake my head at Corporate America and our work system.
I know there are some of us that want to return to work after a death, our friends are there, the work is a welcome, comfortable routine and I totally get that. Everyone, every one processes their grief differently. Grief is as Individual as each of us are.
For me, there is no way I could have functioned in a job this past month since Scott has been gone except for my writing which has been a saving grace for me. Grief has literally knocked me to my knees and cracked open my heart and is changing me in ways I didn\’t know was possible. Changing, me, I will add for the better, for the better to serve those around me and to deepen my empathy and my appreciation for the cycle of life.
Changing our work and money system is something I can\’t possibly tackle. Beginning with empathy is a good start. After losing Scott, I can see another\’s pain more clearly.
In the poem \”From Kindness\” by Naomi Shihab Nye that I posted here earlier says \”Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore\”.
\”Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore.\”